


Cancer Rising? No. Clown Rising.

by clown_rising



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:01:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27126907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clown_rising/pseuds/clown_rising
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

I... Am crusty. And therefore sad, because I am crusty. 

I can promise. Alphonse won't die. But I cannot promise your technical will go well. 

One small step for goth... One huge leap for gothkind

Big Cloak! Running From Death! Big Cloak!

The atypical childhood.... Just springs on you like a feral munkie

:person_running: *bone cracking noises*

I went down to yee haw land and signed up for the gender rodeo

Mmmmmmakeup and mmmmunkie

Tarot said: I assign you a ticket to the gender rodeo

*rubs my idiot bisexual DM hands together*

so basically magic twink ptsd spiderman

Of course :) emotional vulnerability is just one big Thicc Band-Aid that you gotta commit arson upon :purple_heart:

(When I said other things, I specifically meant chemistry, calculus, and being queer)

QUEER PROFICIENCY

People see a character they made and go "You." And then they become the you

The Bongo Congo line goes stupid and goes crazy and all one can do is Cope y'know

Who am I but the clown to delivers your weekly newspaper of shitpost

I will become the math of amusement. I will remain ever-present in the core classes of life and yet I will just sit there and do nothing but send people to restless, fitful slumber

*WHAT ELSE WAS i SUPPOSED TO DO The Globglogabgalab CALLED TO ME AND I HAD TO ANSWER*


	2. The clown is still rising

"The atypical childhood just springs on you like a feral munkie" 

"Donnie actively has to make sure the Montes don't start a fire dot PNG"

"Make sure the twinks are handled with care during transit"

"I'll be sure to mark the box: **Fragile. Live Twinks. "**

"How old is Sid the Sloth? [Controversial discussion _**NOT CLICKBAIT!!!**_ ]

"Young me, writing convoluted war plots with Littlest Pet Shops🤝old me, being a DM"

🏃 _bone cracking noises_ noises

"Nothing says unhinged infants like sipping boba and blasting music from the car all the doors open on top of a parking garage y'know"

"That's just how she is. She sees young confused kids who don't know how to embrace their sexuality or explore the vast world of gender identity and she goes "Let me introduce you to foundation and contour, as well as deep arcane lore."

~~"I went down to yee Haw land and signed up for the gender rodeo."~~

"Mmmmmmakeup and mmmmunkie"

"I. Mosdf the rain.

Hm. 

Miss*"

"Down in Africa?"

"Big cloak! Running from death! Big cloak!"

":k

Not rhwye

That

:)

No glasdes no sigjt"

"Eohgan injects Buff Potions into himself to bench io"

_rubs my idiot bisexual DM hands together_

_Darius voice_ SILAS LIKES EM' OLD SILAS LIK--

"My only release is thinking of the concept of these characters 20/40 years in the future and 70/90 year old Moorse sitting in the gardens basement with a Cane or wheelchair going "God forbid I wasn't *born* a woman in heels. I'll *die* a woman in heels." Swatting Donnie away as she tries to tell Morose to take off her heels."

"Of course :) emotional vulnerability is just one big Thicc Band-Aid that you gotta commit arson upon 💜"

"so basically magic twink ptsd spiderman"

"(When I said other things, I specifically meant chemistry, calculus, and being queer)"

"QUEER PROFICIENCY"

"People see a character they made and go "You." And then they become the you"

"The Bongo Congo line goes stupid and goes crazy and all one can do is Cope y'know"

"Who am I but the clown to delivers your weekly newspaper of shitpost"

"I will become the math of amusement. I will remain ever-present in the core classes of life and yet I will just sit there and do nothing but send people to restless, fitful slumber"

"WHAT _ELSE WAS i SUPPOSED TO DO The Globglogabgalab CALLED TO ME AND I HAD TO ANSWER"_

"They have many friends, including Bone Cheadle, multiple skulls, a floating little girl, the fog machine, the misc bones, and me :)"

"I guess so! I just kin them and the lore opens up."

"I'm trying to evade sleep like god evades taxes regardless of the melatonin in my blood but--"

"I'm not burning babies I swear."

"There's nothing in Aldiel's head but yearning and Morrel's brain just sounds like ambient waves crashing. Sometimes, if he's lucky, there will be a seagull"


	3. The Clown is...Not Sinking!!!

"I Do a little jig. 

Don't need bones when you are God."

"Steven Universe Virus Anime"

"maybe, out of spite, I'll name _my_ character Baliola Tenebrose (dark dark)"

"As I once famously said, "'Loving older women is my hubris'"

"gnomes are small and frustrating and difficult to draw"

"I do not like those words magic man"

"YOU FOOL THAT PAINTBRUSH IS THE SPOON FROM WHICH I FEED"

There is no need to flee"

"I don't wear jorts" tell that to my cAMERA ROLL

“I DO NOT WEAR JORTS” YEAH AND IM NOT A FRUIT

"Bashidukdidee is by all rights, your son."

"He's my _spawn_ there's a diffence."

"i DON'T WANT YOUR SOUL THAT'S TOO MUCH FOR ME TO TAKE CARE OF"

"Alphonse has children thrust upon him Silas seeks out children like an emotional metal detector and Mevllie... Mevllie probably is *responsible *for the creation of some children. They might be undead. I don't know enough about Mevllie to say for certain."

"What can I say, Disney inspires my character design to a fault  but I'm allowed with Etuvarians bc Etuvaria is the Disney country of Ebinor"

"A: Hello? B: Hey, what's up? A: I need your help, can you come here? B: Uh, I can't, I'm buying clothes. A: Alright, well hurry up and come over here. B: I can't find them. A: What do you mean you can't find them? B: I can't find them, there's only tea. A: What do you mean there's only tea? B: It means there's only tea! A: Well then get out of the tea isle! B: Alright you don't have to shout at me! B: There's more tea! A: What do you mean there's more tea? B: There's just more tea! A: Go into the next isle! B: There's still tea! A: Where are you right now? B: I'm at tea! A: What do you mean you're "at tea?" B: I mean I'm at tea! A: What store are you in? B: I'm at the tea store! A: Why are you buying clothes at the tea store? B: Fuck you!"

"I am SO HOMOPHOBIC! I dress like a greaser vampire dad, infodump about feral wizards who live in mushrooms, yearn constantly--all the signs of a homophobe."

"August homophobic moments does not like fruit time"

"However, one of the main wlw was in fact a beekeeper so my "beekeeping is gay" theory stays strong"

"Russian Roulette Cottagecore"

"the pure queer domesticity! the warm sun! the vegetables and fruit trees! the small farm energy where the biggest conflicts aren't going to cost you your life!"

" _maybe_ we can try to keep the cottagecore a _little_ less lethal?"

"Of course  an integral part of "Queer Domesticity" is in fact tending to your friend's weird pets"

"I’m glad the bees have found you

They’ve been looking for a while"

"DONT MAKE ME LAUGJ IN THE MIDDLE OF CHOIR

WHAT DOES THIS ME. AN"

"GO BACK TO CHOIR

THE BEES CAN WAIT"

"I save up my yearn points and cash them in for god powers"

"This locker is my home and I am fueled by my own bisexuality that radiates from it"

"you can surround me with bread and I will be _fine"_

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/773764498396938270/image0.png)

"O--one step closer to becoming _Eoghan?"_

"no, the _other_ bee twink"

"B--Barry B. Benson???!?"

**"no** the other _other_ bee twink"

_**"Yourself?"** _

"probably"

"My ass wanna be a bee farmer ig ;-;"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/756179498919133246/image0.jpg)

"Fun story: I was looking through the records of my old tarot readings and on the day before I started questioning my gender I wrote this in my notes"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/752572504085889214/image0.png)

They are the same:

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/746152992402702486/models_shiteyanyo_promo_icon.jpeg) [ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/746152992809549903/image0-55.jpg)

"Eoghan, after having one(1) conversation with Sylvanus:"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/740649449084289124/image0.gif)

"My brain this morning needed to make this so now you get to enjoy"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/740609899293179995/image0.jpg)


	4. The Clown is Flying

";-; a masterpiecw"

"The slutty, slutty Grim Reaper will have to wait"

"I made the Grim Reaper a slut and now I need to draw bones AND chains :imsomad:"

"

If I die tonight this is the thing that has killed me"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/786852413469622302/image0.jpg)

"(In the middle of MOTW) "You've played Five Nights At Freddy's, right?""

"Eoghan is the e-boy, Sacha is the theater kid, Vera is the goth gamestop employee, and io is the tree hugger"

Zach: I love emotional anguish

Me, looking at Amariel Beltorel: _Oh boy you say that_

"August.exe has stopped working"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/788886881004945448/Screenshot_20201216-145437_Discord.jpg)

"I can’t control the sexy"

"Maybe? I think I’m more like a wild magic sorcerer but instead of crazy magic effects it’s just “ _sexy_ ”"

"My _sexy powers_?"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/789149866328064010/Screenshot_20201217-081939_Instagram.jpg)

"Were sitting at the table of mommy and daddy issues and that's okay because it's a very long and complicated table. But at least we have tea"

"Can't wait to have Sylvanus mention Eoghan in Photor tbh he's gonna be like "Ignore my risky goal to bring back one of my dead best friends and also my dead wife angst. Look at my children."

"Orpheus: Everything I touch dies. Sylvanus: Sylvanus: You're a pussy."

"It’s the Pogust Togust Sketchbook"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/791165551279210496/image0.png)

"I JUST WANT MY FUCKING BAGEL AND DRAG QUEENS"

"My body was actually being possessed by internalized hatred and fear of all men so I had to slice my own skin and wriggle in the "Some boys hot""

"Olaf is small. And twinky. And easily disassembled"

"Aliens are real and they hate fashion"

"I am Rey Torric and this is my clown makeup tutorial--"

"Good luck that's the card that has my tragic past relationship on it--the one that makes the theorical Y/A novel readers go stupid and crazy, forming anti-theoretical fictional Carly Harris Twitter accounts"

"No other way, no consideration from me, I am no longer demisexual because the fruits deemed it so"

"At this point I only say these words for the fact that this joke has been running for nearly a year and we must close this chapter of our lives"

"It's true  they fuck as much as I yearn "

"You Me 

Giving each other NPCS that are free lore real estate"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/794091058161254440/image0.gif)

"I'll beat you with the plot stick too! I have two hands bitch !"

"Were sitting at the table of mommy and daddy issues and that's okay because it's a very long and complicated table. But at least we have tea"

"I JUST HAD TO DRAW A BIG BUFF OIL MONSTER OKAY"

"I hate to say this but Tiamat in my brain just looks like Mrs Harrison but sexier and more evil"

"That's true there is like a solid month of the year where I AM in fact the same age as you. The brief time between July 28th and August 31st, is a brief time of equal bone rotting"

"A brief eclipse of the bone"

"Aru “can recite every Drow military technique by heart but doesn’t know why you can’t just print more money” Aureax Defectionne"

"I can’t help if if you fall in love with my characters. I create and your infatuation is on you"

"If I can use thicc Mothman you can use milf dragon god"

"How do flirt???????"

"Just don't say "you're gorgeous" to someone you like in the school library in front of Rayann Hussain who will never let you forget--"

"Donald Drinker and Spoofy Sayer"

"Please tell me you will harvest the gardens when MOTW ends I cannot see those funky fruits depart forever"


	5. Spring Cleaning, Rat Rising

"mrs harrison? sexy. some boats? sexy. a really good looking apple? also sexy."

"1. The first text was very ominous, for a moment. I had no idea what the ever-living fuck you were talking about.

2\. I processed, oh, BOTQ? Is August not doing this weeks challenge?

3\. You send the third text. I have to read it twice.

4\. I slam my head against my desk as I slowly begin to laugh. The laughter hastens.

5\. I begin to slip off my chair, because I am doubled over. I cannot cease laughter. 6. Predictably, I fall out of my chair into my closet.

7\. I accidentally hit my guitar in my descent.

8\. My guitar falls on me in a grand chorus of dust and untuned strings.

9\. I stand, as if nothing happened."

Hey look its you

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/800231360119832586/image0.jpg)

"Reminder to me to edit catboy thanos"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/800540914522390558/Screenshot_20210117-184344_Discord.jpg)

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/800542042728038400/image0.png)

"Anne Oakley in drag"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/802716550016663552/image0.jpg)

"Sudor punches someone and his piercings emerge from his flesh angrily--i hate this."

"breaking news: botched ritual leaves a piece of god in local satyr's nipple piercings: what happens next will shock you!"

"also sudor is hot in the way that like, raccoons are hot."

"I spent all my Gnome Art tokens on the Nettlebones last year"

"listen. Axel isn’t good because he’s _flawless"_

~~Hey look it’s me~~

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/805908540560244816/image0.jpg)

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/805982896099557456/Screenshot_20210201-190811_Discord.jpg)

"don't make me rub my snot on you, you little bitch", sudor says, picking her nose aggressively

"If Eoghan had a tattoo it would be a collection of bees in the shape of Killikan’s zodiac sign That is all."

" _frog noises_ Avvvvvvvviiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeel"

"That reminds me, does anyone else in Club Twisty know that Sudor has sprinkles of a god living in his nasal cavity?"

hey is saying "Sexy in a frog kind of way" frogist?

"In all forms but mental and emotional, he is a frog"

"Sure I simply could call it your main, but I think the cis account is much more of an enticing alias"

"im pretty sure my other DM just wrote an Eridan kinnie into the NPC that my character has romantic feelings for. and he doesn't know homestuck. but now every time I see that dumb _fruity_ prince with a boob window my brain is just going to be like "Eridan" I _**HATE**_ this"

"DISGUSTING HORRIBLE ILL HAVE YOU KNOW BACK IN MIDDLE SCHOOL WHEN I WAS A HUGE KINNIE I KINNED ALL THREE LEIJONS AND _ZERO_ VANTAS'S"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/807699749888065591/image0.jpg)

"Enemies to acquaintances to lovers to friends to emotional arc buddies"

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/808400419255877652/Screenshot_20210208-111435_Discord.jpg)

"Ah yes, the best advice I've ever given: Just project and it'll produce therapy"

"well one of my players rolled a nat 20 to lockpick it, but the door was magically closed so I was like "well I have to do _something_ with this nat 20" and what I did was make the spirit inside of the door say 'oooh that feels nice'"

"H0RN7 D00R"

"Genderfluid, Group Parent, The One Calm Force, and Carrier of The Wisdom Braincell"

Me: I'm having senioritis, I'm gonna dye my hair pastel pink.

Sanya: _Oh god, you're having a twink breakdown_

Like, "Damn you, you're a pebble." ?!?

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/812010753463812126/Screenshot_20210218-102042_Discord.jpg)

"Rat King mentoring anyone sounds horrid but it's okay bc everyone who worships Ara is a little freak"

"but whenever someone asks they'll be like "It's actually short for megalomaniac""

Rat king in this t shirt

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/812081252186193930/main-image-34.png)

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/812083448390090762/20210218_150933.jpg)

Rat King goes up to Aviel Jorel, calls him the f slur even though he is straight, and scuttles away

" _scuttling noises, an f slur can be heard in the distance. There is yelling, a crash, and a screaming cat. Rat King scuttles back into the room. he puts out the fire in his hair and grins"_

"Actually this just made me realize Mevllie also has a 28th birthday because their birthday is the 28th of Elder Scrolls February and now I'm uncomfortable"

" have seven new genders for you"

"no!!!!! I have more self respect than to ever let myself be called a boomer!"

"

Anyways here’s a rendition, drawn with the crayon but you used to plot your birthday oneshot, of course

[ ](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/640411692718882828/806741318793429022/image0.jpg)


End file.
